Montessori Moment: Grace and Courtesy
The beginning of each year in a Montessori classroom starts with many lessons in the “Grace and Courtesy” area of the classroom. This area usually doesn’t have many materials that you can see on shelves, but instead involves role-playing everyday situations the children will come across in the classroom. These range from pushing in chairs when they leave the table, to saying “excuse me” and “you are excused” when they pass by one another. Some of these lessons happen in the moment, but often they happen in a neutral moment to give the children a sort of tool box to use in later situations.
Some lessons are done ahead of time to prepare for a special event- like Stone Soup!
Grace and Courtesy goes beyond just manners- these lessons help children care for one another and their classrooms in a way that is respectful. Just like anything we do in the casa, we hope these lessons will later translate to how the children interact with the greater world around them.
The holiday season is a great time to practice some of these lessons at home! If you are expecting to attend a holiday dinner, perhaps consider “practicing” with your child how to sit at the table and eat without getting up. How to give and receive gifts is also a fantastic grace and courtesy lesson. This idea from Raintree Montessori would be great to practice at home
Wrap up a small box to look like a festive gift. Practice giving it to your child saying things like “I saw this, and it made me think of you” or “I love you so much and I want you to have this special present”. Then let your child practice giving the gift to you. Respond with words like “It is so thoughtful of you” and “It really makes me happy that you thought of me”. The careful wording focuses on the gesture rather than the actual gift itself. The “present”, which is really just an empty box anyway, is never opened, again highlighting the intention and emotion rather than what’s under the wrappings.
Remember, your children are all very new to these things and just need to know the expectations for their behavior! Then, it’s all about practice.